Thursday, December 20, 2012

Believing in Limitless Potential

This is a goal of ACME's and I saw it achieved between the Venezuelan Simon Bolivar orchestra members and the kids who attended the seminario in NYC. Something that is not said enough about El Sistema in Venezuela is the arduous work ethic. I observed the percussion sectional and Victor, the SB musician, had one student who was 7 yrs old and just started two weeks ago and a twelve year old who had played for five years and one student somewhere in between those two benchmarks. He treated them all in the same way and had the same expectations of them. He asked each student what types of notes they liked. The oldest student said sixteenth notes and Victor drew a sixteenth note on the board. Then he asked the newest student his favorite. The teacher of the newest student was also present in the room and intervened, telling Victor that he had just started a few weeks ago so he only knows quarter notes and thus those were the notes he liked. Victor realized this wasn't going to achieve success. He then had them play different instruments giving the newest student the timpani. The oldest student received a semi-more complex rhythm while the newest student was meant to beat every 4 counts between the low and high timpani drum. The newest student continued to speed up or get off beat, but instead of reprimanding him, lowering expectations, or excusing him because he had only been playing a few weeks, Victor did something to make it more challenging: he turned off the lights. This was a windowless room and it literally became pitch dark. He then asked the students to continue their patterns but to go from 4/4 to 3/4 (he had talked about this concept earlier). I will admit even I thought this was too lofty an expectation. It took a few times around, but the youngest student was now not only on beat, but able to switch from 4/4 to 3/4 and stay on beat..IN THE DARK! He needed that extra challenge to have the motivation and perhaps (though I am merely conjecturing) the pressure/expectation of his teacher off of him. After successfully doing this for several minutes, I heard a drum stick hit the floor, and Victor made them continue. Aside from the clicking noise of the stick hitting the floor, I never would have known as the student continued to be precisely on beat, now using only one stick. Eventually the youngest student said the obvious "I can't see!" and it was apparent they had reached their maximum with this exercise.

 But that moment taught me so much. 1) That sometimes when a student can't do something, challenging them more will result in success 2) Taking away a sense (vision) made them rely solely on their ears and we should execute exercises in ear training with no sight more often! and 3) not setting limits on a child's potential despite their current ability/experience (or lack there of). The kids ended up practicing 5.5 hours and it was the adults who were insisting the kids needed a break. Something that will stick with me is when I told Victor he had 5 minutes til lunch (After rehearsing for 3 hrs). He replied, "Ya?" meaning already? He couldn't believe we were having lunch after ONLY three hours of practice! Again reiterating the arduous work ethic that is so apparent in Venezuela.

And now an aside, sorry if it's tangential. Originally, some of the "El Sistema tenets" occurred because of lack of resources and yet we who have a replete amount of those resources are striving to do things in the El Sistema way because of the success that brought. Example: peer teaching. We've all seen the benefits peers teaching one another has, it's more efficient and usually more effective, not to mention developing teaching experience from a young age (and fiscally cost-effective!). But in Venezuela the reason this is done is because of the dearth of teachers. They still have conservatories where traditional studying occurs, but with 286 nucleos and 400,000 students and 5,000 teachers, that's a student:teacher ratio of 80:1. El Sistema teaches in an ensemble setting instead of a private lesson setting because they don't have said teachers, practice rooms, and other resources needed. One nucleo is a mango tree, another on top of the city dump. They're not necessarily in schools or community centers as they are here in the US. Yet we have seen the benefits teaching in a social environment has! In fact, it is one of the successful factors Dr. Shirley Brice Heath discovered when she stated characteristics of effective afterschool programs.

So how do we balance our resourcefulness with striving to be El Sistema? This is a question to ponder and I invite feedback!

Friday, December 14, 2012

Sacrifice/Building a Life


I have SO much reflecting to do I'm not even sure where to begin, but I'll start with two themes and see how this post ends up. I just returned from the City after a seminario and residency with the Simon Bolivar musicians. Everything everyone says about how amazing they are is SO true!!!!!!! AND I met Dr. Abreu and Dudamel themselves and worked with a percussionist! But it was at my own will that I met Dr. Abreu. I seize opportunities. That's what makes me "me". And I recently had an intense conversation about balancing this with sacrifice. I suppose I'm just not quite at that point and a good reason why I have no children b/c I will certainly sacrifice for them. But if an opportunity is there and is time-sensitive, nothing in my head could possibly make sense to wait and turn it down. That doesn't mean I won't share, I will and I do. But on average, I would say my speed of living life is faster than most people, causing me to become impatient, antsy, frustrated, easily. But why I value time so much to the point that I become this way, I don't know. Only that it is one resource one can never gain back and life is short so I want to make the most of it. SO I guess I'm at that point.. Will I sacrifice my sense of adventure for the children so I can build solid relationships and a community? Or rather will it be possible for me to truly still feel like I'm living life to the fullest in one place and not fulfilling this with just my job?

This idea of building a life somewhere terrifies me. Just like it may terrify some to go live in another country for a year, for me knowing it's only a year makes anything doable and inviting. Potentially, setting up camp somewhere semi-permanently...I'm trying to imagine that and I just don't know,,,that notion scares me greatly! It also makes thinking about next year quite difficult. I know I"m only 3.5 months in and I should enjoy the present and not worry, but I'm human and we don't like the unknown. I still greatly want to do a stint in SE Asia, and I still feel I'm at the stage of life where doing that is not only possible, but preferred. When someone asks me the question of where WOULD I be happy next year, I just shutter. I don't have a one place mind. That's the issue.

Staying with my dad's best friend from kindergarten, I learned a lot about him and thus myself.  She said he was the same person then that he is today and is always asking three questions: What can I do? What can I learn? Where can I go? And I think he instilled these into me, with the addition of one: Who can I meet? I certainly do not mean in the starstruck, drooling, and venerated celebrities, but rather who can enter my life long enough to have a meaningful conversation with him/her that will impact the way I see the world, how big or how small. And usually those people tend to be from other cultures, expanding my own paradigm to new paths I've never trod. In addition to the people, it's these experiences where there is a challenge where I grow the most. I've been terrified of complacency for a long time and now is no exception. Living in America is so easy and I can't understand full gratitude without its absence. That probably makes no sense, but so be it. Perhaps a better way of articulating that is my true fear is a complacent and unfulfilled life.

 I wrote about this earlier in the year, but as the year continues, I'm realizing two things: I'm my dad's daughter and because my environment constantly changes, I build relationships quickly and trust not only easily, but quickly. If I answer this from a Darwinian standpoint, it makes sense. With a dynamic environment and no constant, it is essential to build relationships with people when I know no one in order to survive (sorry if that sounds overly dramatic). Because I've lived me, myself and I, it doesn't phase me to talk to someone nor to do it at the pace I'm used to experiencing life. But how do I adapt while still feeling fulfilled? This is where the word compromise comes in. Perhaps I can enter that next stage of life...but perhaps just not yet.

Thursday, November 22, 2012

Ideas, People, and Things-A life musing

These are the three things people can talk about and today I had a revelation. The reason I hate small talk (things) is because I never talk about things. Catch-up is always talking about people and while interesting and I care about my loved ones, this allows for finite conversation, only to hear what's new with someone, and then what? It's this third category-ideas-where I enjoy the most and realized it's because of this category that I can have a meaningful, impacting, or memorable conversation with people I barely know or whom I have just met. The people I really click with are in this last category. It's the reason I can be anywhere and make friends without a ten year history and the reason why I can catch up with friends in a jiffy. It's also the reason I can sometimes feel bored playing catch-up; it's not my area of topicking.

I've also realized how incredibly hard it is for me to do nothing. A day where I bake, go on a hike, get my hair cut, and see a friend, isn't enough for me. I enjoyed all these things, especially the nice weather!, but I feel like multiple hours were spent doing what a lot of people enjoy doing: nothing. How am I such a lifeaholic? I think that is the answer. Because I am addicted to living life I want things to happen all the time and in a field like Sistema it does. When it doesn't, I feel like there is a void and I SHOULD be doing something, perhaps the reason is as simple as that's what I'm used to doing, and perhaps there is merit in always wanting life in the fullest sense of the word.

I also forget how much I love food until I come home. I have a habit (probably a bad one) of sampling the smorgasbord of food at our house. I need to taste every flavor all at once and it almost always hits in the evening, after metabolism slows down. It's so bizarre but today when I went to try a processed chip/cracker, I actually opted for the apple! A dietary trend I've noticed in my lifetime is if I don't have something for awhile, after going through withdrawal, I don't like it anymore. This started with Dr. Pepper when I gave it up in 8th grade for Lent, then candy (AMerican), then salami and burgers in TZ, and now chips and creamy cheeses. My body actually prefers healthy foods (not to mention can't eat the other stuff)!

Lastly, I'm still struggling with the consumerism attitude towards Christmas in America. The only reason people originally gave gifts was because it was a birthday. Now it's turned into the purpose and I'm a grinch if I don't participate. Why isn't sacrificing productivity at work and valuing and spending time with loved ones and eating a good meal sufficient? I certainly don't need any more material items. If I were traveling, it'd be understood I don't give gifts, but living here, it's an expectation, one that is usually unspoken. I'll cook you a dinner or spend time doing something together, is that okay? Yes part of this is me being a budget, but not wholly. I think even if I weren't on a budget (ha, that'll be the day), I'd conserve the money and spend it on something worthwhile. Yes I am calling your present unworthy.




Sunday, November 18, 2012

Whirlwind over, Phase III begins

I had yet another enlightening evening speaking to Jonathan Govias who I abbreviate as JG. We talked about a lot including the idea of facilitation vs. teaching, which he showed us a clip of him doing in Brazil and started out with a model of competence and eventually worked in each part of the orchestra, to the point where after 25-30 mins. he was only conducting cutoffs. It meant he could go back to Boston and they could play on their own. THIS is what we should be inspiring in our students. How do students learn? Observation, imitation, repetition. That's how a child learns. Someone also made a good point. Sistema never claimed to be kid-centric. We never established that as a tenet and if we thought it was implicit or assumed, well you know what they say about assumptions...Is this a tenet we all agree on? Because teaching majorly, continues to be teacher-centric.

After successful residency presentations (Yay Tony's public speaking class!), we've started having evaluation/assessment/research conversations and I heard a great tool: the utilization model, creating assessment from an organization's values, not their mission statement, and certainly not their programming. By doing so, an org creates intentional results instead of residual ones. Again something that makes so much sense, but isn't just there. Problem is, does ES have a consensus on national values?

 JG also said something very interesting about Sophie his 2 yr old daughter and literacy/education. It is essential to read because he wants her to be able to access any existing knowledge in any form and make new thoughts on them. That is what education should be, is it not? Especially in this day and age, we talk so much, we watch so much, we sometimes listen, but how often do we read? Not too much for the average person anyway. Every time I enter a plane (which seems to be at least monthly at this point!) and I sit down next to a child, they are not sleeping, they are not reading or drawing; rather they are playing Angry Birds on an ipad. When the flight attendant mandated all electronics must be shut off, the dad purchased a video for the kid on the tv, and when we reached 10,000 feet the iPad was resumed. Aside from not understanding the greatness of Angry Birds, we are incredibly hindering this new generation of children if they never read except when forced to in school, and the absence of activities like coloring or drawing stifle the child's creativity/imagination. Everything is becoming technology-driven and thought, which means innovation and creativity are being relegated to optional and our children will only view problems logically (a program to say the least). Without creativity, innovation, and new ideas, how are we not emotional robots merely using technology?

We've also learned a lot about group dynamic this week. I never studied psychology so while it isn't common sense, it's incredibly self-explanatory and easy to grasp and fascinating! If we treat any group discussion like an ensemble keeping the objective/end goal in mind, we can be a lot more productive.


Sunday, November 11, 2012

An Urgent Calling to Anyone Who Cares About Education: Discrimination Is Anything But Dead



I learned this last year in Tanzania when I was reversely discriminized against, assuming since I was white, I had money, but that pales in comparison to what I heard yesterday, something that absolutely implored me and made me seething. Carver Elementary, the school where Soundscapes is located, just lost their accreditation and is now lowering their standardized test passing rates according to race. That’s right ladies and gentleman, the students are assessed on if they pass/fail by the color of their skin (ARE WE NOT IN 20!2?!?!?!!?!?)

If that doesn’t exacerbate the reasons why standardized tests should cease immediately! Standardized tests are a horrible way to assess children. Not only do they only cater to one learning style, only assess one type of learning, don’t account for students who don’t test well, nor are evaluated for the least important audience (someone that is not in the classroom), they also require schools to not care about the student’s learning and do anything including preposterous motions like the one above, to continue receiving federal funding. This is at a school where a high majority of the teachers and principal are African Americans themselves!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! If you have even one inkling of pride, HOW THE HELL can you belittle your race to a 32%?!?!?! You may as well How can you ay poor people and people who speak more than one language (which I assure you the people who passed this measure do not!) don’t have the same capacity as students born into more affluent and white families?! I don’t usually swear on this blog to keep a professional tone, but that is absolute BULL SHIT!

In order to make more children pass, they are lowering standardized test passing rates to match the student’s race/economic status. Asians must receive an 82% to pass, whites 68%, and African Americans, impoverished, special needs, and English as a second language students, 32%. 32%...Let me remind you that is half of an F and that is a 50% difference between Asians and the lowest category. Aside from the ostentatious discrimination and pejorative behavior being exhibited,  if the goal is to increase academic achievement, justify how lowering expectations will help. All that is doing is reinforcing the entrenched poverty and hierarchy of society, discouraging belief in self, and reversing the civil rights for which our country strived! It is not bettering anyone, in any capacity of the word, which call me a lunatic, I thought was the goal of education!!!!!!!!!!!

We’ve discussed motivation and engagement being the essential components to academic success. If you remove the reason for drive, motivation, AND excellence, especially from an early age of 3rd grade when these tests begin, children will not strive to work hard, and issues like high school dropout will continue to increase, college will be unattainable, and drugs, teen pregnancies, alcohol, gangs, and crime will pervade.

An even worse part about this measure? Parents are unaware (GO FIGURE!) and this isn’t the only state to have such a measure. Florida, XXX, do too. How is this the first time I’ve heard of this? We need action FAST. While music is an incredibly beneficial tool to increase engagement and motivation along with many other life skills (discipline, self esteem, team work, hard work, etc etc), if we don’t have high expectations for children, there will be severe repercussions.

The Chula Vista School District has been transformed the past seven years from a struggling school to one of recognition and success. The superintendent John Nelson gave me a recipe for academic success:
1)   High expectations
2)   Transparency of data
3)   Professional development for teachers/principal
4)   Culture of accountability
5)   Goal of continuous improvement
6)   Collaboration between teachers/administration
A common theme resonates in the above: Improving the learners by working together, accepting where they are currently, and holding each other accountable to improve. Virginia isn’t meeting ANY of those. If those of us are truly concerned about Science, Technology, Mathematics and Engineering (STEM) and are worried about China surpassing us (if it hasn’t already), how is lowering expectations going to achieve this? Comments welcome.

Friday, November 9, 2012

Residency Part V: Visit to the 2nd US Sistema-Inspired site

It is true unless someone can prove me wrong. Soundscapes has been going since fall 2009! (And I couldn't think of a creative title)

I just finished a 3.5 hr project of researching the other N Minneapolis afterschool programs and to my surprise, there were many more than I imagined, especially focusing on mentoring and youth development. It made me really excited for the potential of ACME having so many new partnerships and me being the one creating those..baby steps though. I glanced at the calendar upon return to Boston and it is chalk-full!

Soundscapes has been a lot of new experiences including teaching my first strings sectional, being the teacher who gets everyone quiet (!!!), woofing a child (praising incessantly), helping instruments I don't know how to play, relating cells in Excel, putting together media kits, and learning how to work a Brothers' copy machine (ha!). It has been really interesting to compare the behaviors and environment of a pre-dominantly African-American school rather than Latinos as it was in CA. They are unique in that they have hired a behavior specialist to help rein in the children due to the racial difference in discipline/attitude. Much tougher kids, but watching their 4.5 hour rehearsal yesterday and seeing the kids pushed to their absolute maximum, some breaking, but overcoming it, was amazing and incredibly rewarding. They're also unique in that much of their teaching staff is on the older end of the spectrum so it has been interesting to watch the different personalities/backgrounds, teaching styles, and Southern accents (note: comments are always funnier with a southern drawl. Ex: "My ol' Chihuahua woke me out of beyd at 1:20 in the morning.") if I may comment ;p.

I have noticed that "Lorrie Heagy" repertoire and techniques that have been incredibly universal are praising children who are doing good behavior in hopes of correcting those who aren't, acknowledging quiet hands, and making it relevant to them. Two that I think could be more prevalent are movement and the idea of levels/bowing or some type of achievement mechanism.

Soundscapes has been so transparent and honest with me and I've had a lot of wonderful discussions, and organically too. I'm not a constant scribe (for once!). I met with a Kiwanis member (If you are a Sistema leader, look up this in your local community, they're a volunteer organization all about helping children) who is conducting and creating the assessment for the Soundscapes kids. Really excited to have the final report of that! The only program I have seen that has even calculated standard deviation!

On a non-El Sistema note, I'm incredibly grateful I know how to drive stick because it's allowed me access to a car. Public transport here is worse than LA (granted it's not a metropolis..)! I went to Williamsburg on Election Day afternoon and loved it! I want to go back and spend the whole day listening to the old English, reading signs like poft office, and seeing all the colonial architecture and costumed colonial townspeople. I owned the American Girl Felicity growing up and always wished I could live during this era if I were to time travel (though the Victorian era is a toss-up). Aside from the cold, it was so beautiful with the leaves a bright red foliage, and the crisp, cool air (if only I had had warm cider). The Colonial Parkway, the drive to get there, was just as beautiful with meandering turns, lakes surrounded by the fall foliage, and just a very picturesque traverse. I briefly saw Jamestown, but didn't have the desire to stand outside for another 2.5 hrs so I'll have to see the original settlement next time (and bring my National Parks Passport as I was unaware this was one. Note: If there is ANY possibility, I need my passport, from now I am traveling with it. I had quite a lot of hassle with this, but found out yesterday that my passport after arriving at an incorrect address had been safely returned whew.

It was also an eventful week because of the election. The program coordinator here has been incredibly gracious in letting me invade on his social life so I got to hang with his friends and drink and be merry with grapes, brownies, crackers and cheese. We made it through Obama's acceptance speech at 2 am. And I am very proud of my home state and being the only one to reject the voter ID law and gay marriage amendment, but I promise not to go all political on you.

One last day of a fundraising, ED/founder, and board meeting followed by a Virginia Symphony concert of Beethoven 7 (the second one this week!) and hopefully one last night on the town. Now that it's finally beautiful weather outside (it reached almost 60˚) I'm about to return to snow, but I am excited to return! I miss my fellow fellows and being in my own space and the constant going-ons that is Boston. Though people have been nothing but incredibly hospitable and generous and I could not have asked for better hosts. Thank you to all!!!


Saturday, November 3, 2012

Residency Part IV: CA to VA

My last week in CA was spent observing VYMA and ICAN in Santa Barbara, which included a meeting with Erik Holmgren about MAT program at a small Christian college. It got me so excited to realize what possibilities universities bring. It also raised an issue that I had seen earlier that day in a job description: the idea of doing El Sistema with a religious institution. The mission aligns, but the objective is different "to do it for the glory of God" vs "to manifest social change and build stronger communities." Of course a Christian university or church is just a space, but aren't we being exclusive or at least prejudice when we host things at a place that is incredibly codified and exclusive even if it is "open to all"? Food for thought. Again, I welcome comments.

Adam, the program director at ICAN, added to Dalouge's "redirecting allocation of resources", the fact of reprioritizing and the added benefit of having the same teacher with the kids consecutive years instead of the mere 9 month period a teacher receives during the school year.

 Santa Barbara was gorgeous as everyone says and I got some great teaching tool ideas as well as getting to see not just a singing class, but an actual choir! I spent my Halloween going for a jog, seeing the Mission, oogling at all the costumes, and then sipping wine, eating hors'd'ouvres on the rooftop of the fancy hotel in town watching the sunset-first and only in CA, pretty sad considering I was there two weeks!) ICAN kids and Thriller dancers perform. Pretty spectacular!

 I then had a long conversation about sustainability with Margaret Martin and using profit group lessons to help pay for the kids who couldn't afford it and at the same time be employing teachers and bringing together communities-reminded me a lot of Tanzania, but again another way I could put Z's Keys back in business...Seems an ingenious idea to me! This field never stops finding new ways to utilize ME as ME.

The flight to get here was literally the worst (and I've flown A LOT!) with four screaming babies, tired, hungry, thirsty Sara, a dead laptop (after working on the San Diego report that is now over 16 pages!), and my first migraine headache ever (that's what I imagine it was anyway as I don't know anything else that is that painful, that pressurized, and that centralized in one location-my left eyebrow bone) but a nice woman from VA gave me some homemade chocolate claiming it would help and upon arrival despite the significant drop in temperature, I was greeted with a warm Rey and seafood dinner to boot!

I'm now in Newport News, VA with Soundscapes.  I love their name and their tag is "Changing how the future sounds." Soundscapes is off the radar, despite the fact they're one of the oldest ES-inspired programs (I think 2nd after Orchkids since Oct 2009) and they launched in under 5 months! I watched every instrument family, choir, and orchestra today along with a delicious Indian lunch and meeting about their brochure, along with helping for a bibliography for a STEM->STEAM (Science Technology Engineering (ARTS) Math) grant for which they're applying from the National Science Foundation, and the open house I am planning taking place next Thurs. The woman I am staying with is a local music teacher and incredibly generous, but I'm thankful to be exploring the more "hip" part of town tomorrow, though I found out I am by the country's second largest park and it is autumn all over again so definitely checking that out! I'm teaching my first-ever strings class on Mon. where we will definitely be working on pizza hand and intonation. It will be a good experience for me, a chance to practice my Lorrie Heagy skills, and a chance for me to assure myself I know enough about strings to do so and get a musical outcome since I have the kids who already know how to play.

They have a unique curriculum here of project-based learning starting by making their own instruments (not just violins but a model from each instrument family! we're making box guitars next week), choir, bucket band where they learn how to read rhythms, recorders, and the paper orchestra. The second year they do children's choir with two/three parts, choose their instrument which they list their three favorites and the teachers choose which instrument best suits them, and begin note reading and playing instruments. The third year performs often, has choir, and orchestra. Lots going on and this is only day one! I will certainly be ready for Boston come next Saturday!

Monday, October 29, 2012

"Jobs not Jails." Homeboy Industries: A Must See for Anyone in LA

The past hour blew my mind. A 37 yr old man named Neal honestly told us his whole life story and the only way I knew it would have a resolution was the fact that he was physically standing right there, wearing a Homeboy Industries shirt showing he worked there. One thing I struggle with often in this line of work, is how blessed and privileged I have been and to me it is important to if not relate, at least be able to empathize with those around me. Of course this is not a bad thing that I have such a wonderful family and upbringing, but just when I think I've seen hardship enough to at least empathize-> extreme poverty, patients with malaria, children with malnutrition and no shoes,  orphans, victims of the Rwandan genocide, and domestically abused women to name a few, the list continues to lengthen. Here is yet another way I have now seen hardship, drugs. You always hear the stories in DARE not to use drugs or watch videos on how badly they can screw up your life, but here was a true account coming from an individual who had lived through it all. 

He had one brother left after the other five and his dad had died from being heroine addicts. He went through a DARE program and was determined to change. His mom was physically abused and he fought the boyfriend, resulting in a prison sentence of five years. DUring this time, he had no contacts with his family and an IV addict explained ot him the reason he did it was to make time pass faster as it allowed him to be in a vegetative state for several hours. And as most drugs do, a little turned into an IV addiction. When he got out of prison, he became a construction worker, but left work feeling empty. When he was laid off and just needed to pay bills, selling drugs seemed an easy way to do so. Until that decision resulted in being ducttaped and kidnapped in an abandoned house. A squatter couple found him and if they hadn't...

He decided then he must change if he didn't want to end up like his other family members. He went with the ducttape still on his arms to Homeboy and has now been there 17 months. If they had to lay him off, he would still volunteer and when he does go to other employment, he will always keep Homeboy in his vocabulary. A quote he said that will resonate with me for awhile is, "My dad taught me to steal a bike, not ride one." They steal from the rich because they know they can just buy another one without any concept of what it means to earn that money. They don't have an opportunity to change their mindset. Yes I know this sounds like an incredibly radical scapegoat and perhaps ignorant, but think about it. 

Homeboy is so transformative because it not only offers free services like tattoo removal with 21,000 removals a year, a free lawyer, counselors, and jobs, but classes. THis is where the transformation takes place; "you have to change your mind; otherwise it will happen again." SO they have classes from anger management to choir to yoga to bookclub to parent and me. THey have a high school for the kids and Neal went to a domestic abuse class, not because he had ever done that. But because he wanted to understand why his mom put up with it. He doesn't still and strives to encourage women they can do it on their own. Women are stronger (dang right!). 

After this heartwrenching, but very real story out in the sunny garden, I expected a pedestrian tour of seeing offices and the bakery. No such thing. Our next stop was the tattoo removal doctor who told me 27 doctors volunteer their time. The tattoo machine alone costs 50,000 and the laser glasses were $500. But then he asked us to put on the glasses and we witnessed a tattoo removal. They focus on wrist down and neck up since the rest can be hidden and have clients from all over the country ranging from 5 yrs old to 70. 5 yr olds come with what you may think is an innocent Hello Kitty symbol that is actually a gang and leads to triggered shootings. Or three dots on the eye (my crazy life). The guy we witnessed had VLM tattooed on his cheek and had a baby on the way, which triggers shootings. 

The laser gun was like 10,000 rubber bands snapping against his face a second, which sounds painful enough. But then when he showed us what it was literally doing against the wall, it sparked! Obviously excruciatingly painful, but temporary pain to change their lives and keep their families safe. " It took Neal 17 treatments and a year and a half to remove his neck tattoo, but now he has time for his two kids to be a dad, his wife to be a husband, and time for himself. He does things he would never have imagined like yoga and knows a new way. 

There are 2100 gangs in LA. A Jesuit priest made himself relevant to ex-incarcerated and gang members in LA. How can we not? If we spent $1500 on a child per year, we could keep them safe and belonging to a positive musical experience, all the while expanding their academics and character, increasing their family involvement, and preparing them to be global citizens. It's a primary prevention tool and in the long run would save us billions (it costs about 300,000 over a lifetime for a highschool dropout). We can have safer communities, better children's lives, and save money. How does it get better than that? Obviously, it's not a magic switch or an overnight occurrence, but this is what these programs CAN do. 95% of graduates from these programs went on to college and one even was a Fulbright scholar!

Residency Part III: LA Bustle

Yes the traffic of LA traffic is certainly true, but so is the beautiful weather, bountiful palm trees, and delicious fruits/veggies (read; AVOCADOS!!!). This past week has been amazing, especially from a teaching perspective! HOLA has some incredible teachers who truly develop the children holistically, strive for self-efficacy, and have dynamite classroom management. It's been a lot of fun too to rediscover my percussion skills-I taught a girl how to drumroll-and I have played viola in the orchestra several days this week. My alto clef reading is seriously fuzzy!

The two fellows out here, Dan and Christine, work so hard, but they more than accommodated us into their schedules and I also had some very productive meetings with the head of Ed at LA Phil and the senior grantwriter as well as a researcher at the Brain and Creativity Institute doing longitudinal research with them and the head of community and government affairs. After an absolutely phenomenal performance with the LA Phil, Erik asked me, "What is more certain?" and I think ironically the only thing that is more certain, is the constant inquiry and lack of never arriving at a certain destination i.e. nothing is more certain than the fact that there is nothing certain. That things develop organically and change is always possible.

Something I learned about Venezuela is that despite the majority of funding coming from government at the national, regional, and local level, they are mainly responsible for the  HR of a program. A program in Guarico still had 25 other financial sponsors on their calendar. So the scapegoat of "well in Venezuela the government pays for it," isn't exactly what it seems.

I've also noticed the value of having a diverse staff. While my initial thought was,'This is the 21st century, why should we encourage not being colorblind,' I didn't realize that the parents of these children did grow up during the Civil Rights Movement and we need to be sensitive to this.

in contrast to SDYS, everything was done in a single nucleo site due to multiple factors. One being the turnover at schools. If the principal leaves that was backing your program, then what? The scale of LAUSD and the fact that if the parents have to enroll their kids outside of school, it mandates a higher level of parent and family responsibility and thus is more likely to have parents involved. Interesting. It also gave them a chance to create a new culture and not have to mold themselves to the school culture.

Some moments I will remember from the week:

*the encouraged self-efficacy teaching and exceptional teaching in general
*Homeboy Industries (see blog post above)
*LA Phil concert of Mahler 5, need I say more?
*Harmony Project's Dream center where there were mentor/mentee private lessons going on everywhere I looked from the nursery to the stairwell to the hallway to the water fountain!
*A 2.5 hr dinner with Margaret Martin where I didn't once put down my pen. Important lesson was US citizens spend money on their safety and if you use this as a way to prevent violence, gang or otherwise, funding will come, regardless of political alignment
*Cultures of different sized organizations and wordsmithing to audience
*Boundaries and always going into something with an idea compared to a blank slate
*"Do only that which you can do." The work will never stop so set that and trust others



Tuesday, October 23, 2012

Residency Part II: Ser Y No Ser

I truly understand what this means after my one week immersion with SDYS, especially thanks to conversations with Dalouge and Juan Palacios. For those of you who don't speak Spanish, the literal translation is being and not being, meaning always willing to adapt and change based off of what one continually seeks to learn and the sense of a constant inquiry. ES seems more and more perfect for me everyday ;p It is to this mentality and a constant sense of learning from others and then willing to adapt, change, and rethink a project that Dalouge claims has been his best resource and in turn, which palpates a constant sense of communication and understanding around the organization (and IMHO consequently what won them the 2012 Prudential Leadership award out of countless US nonprofits!!).

Erik said something at our first session this year about not putting stakes in the ground and I have now spent two posts on defining El Sistema, or attempting. This one is to update that and put a stake in a new ground: it really doesn't matter, and it truly is about meeting the needs of the community and following the organization's mission. SDYS could not be a better example of this as they strive to see how they are going to evoke "social change" in their already existing organization of 67 years and wanting to truly represent the demographics of San Diego. In doing this, Opus is molded.

Juan Palacios, a conductor of SDYS and a former nucleo leader of the infamous ES student that plays in the Berlin Philharmonic, made me also see ES leadership in a new light. His nucleo was incredibly unique in that it required the students to not only study in the typical orchestral setting, but also in a chamber music setting, and a conservatory setting-a bit more similar to a US university student. He didn't want to just develop musicians who could play, but could understand the music through its history, composition, and structure (theory). He also was the only nucleo that let the students not necessarily pursue music, but rather pursue the art of music at the highest level he/she could, and bring that excellence to whatever else he/she may do in life. As a result, only 1/3-1/2 of his students pursued music; however every single one that did, now plays in a professional orchestra and won a scholarship to study abroad. Dr. Abreu respects him and he respects Dr. Abreu; they are going about the same mission in a different way. He also told me about the incessant work ethic of Dr. Abreu's mind, calling him at 4:45 am asking him about measure 447 and him having to explain he slept until 6 am to which Dr. Abreu responded, "okay, I'll call you then." This is only one example of how this model cannot literally be transplanted here and needs to be adapted; I think we all recognize that. Rehearsals there can last 4-16 hour rehearsals, seven days a week. He claims the only place Sistema as it is, (ser) will permanently succeed is Venezuela due to this work ethic and exceptionally intelligent leader that is Dr. Abreu that cannot be replaced elsewhere.

Opus' model is very unique, bringing the music back into the schools, instead of having one central nucleo or the franchise model. Dalouge makes a good point: "What place is more accessible to children, has more resources, and IS the nucleo of children than their schools? All I'm doing is redirecting the allocation of resources." Would love to invite comments.

Friday, October 19, 2012

Opus part II

The previous blog was getting far too long so I decided to continue today's happenings here.

First on the agenda was a meeting with Jon Iversen from The Neuroscience Institute and UCSD where they will be measuring their behavior with test groups of karate (another activity of the same intensity, requiring discipline and practice), kids who do neither, and music, measuring annually for five years (they're on year 2 now). They will also be doing a study on the actual brain structure by using brain imaging! And they will be doing research on the brain stem response. FASCINATING!

Then a mtg with the asst superintendent John Nelson.  He described his district as being the catalyst to change the community, analogously to the way Eric Booth described the teacher in the Tanzanian community who goes into the community and finds out what needs to be done to meet community needs and then is held accountable to make a plan to attain that goal. He also talked about music being important because the kids need balance in their life and it gives them motivation. Side tangent: did you know some districts are trying to take fiction books out of their elementary schools??? Yea let's make kids hate reading even more than they already do with all the technology that has supplanted it completely. If we use music as a way to improve math or reading or writing, we're undermining music and the value it has in and of itself, if it's merely a way to improve other things. He wants to see SDYS represent the true demographics of the community. Apparently Chula Vista has the highest performing kids in the STATE! A lot of concepts such as "zone of proximal development" were highlighted.

I also got my hand at team teaching with Cristina with the kindergartners, another in-school program. Tupperwares with felt tops are great drums! She was an excellent teacher, we sang Twinkle Twinkle with words about fall, and then added instruments. She did a perfect example of building on one concept, praising positive behavior, and using leadership as an incentive. Rebecca Levi's idea of "sleeping instruments" worked really well too!

Finally a community concert sponsored by Ford Motor to tour ten different schools to have the YMCA afterschool program be able to listen to them. It included the William Tell Overture, Orpheus, Night Rider, Somewhere over the Rainbow, Cello Squadron (which let the cellos be soloists!), students explaining the differences between the different strings and more, but those were the highlights. Their conductor Ramon is fantastic and a professional violist from the Puerto Rican orchestra!

Yesterday in a class of 25, half the kids were new, never having played an instrument, the other half having played for a year. How did Mr. Soto reconcile this? By using the older kids to play the role of teacher and literally teach the new kids how to hold an instrument. Thank you peer teaching!

SDYS is a perfect example of not needing to be a Fellow to have a successful program, you just need the hunger to seek the answers. Lauren (the prog dir) is an amazing leader, wonderful person, and outstanding host! The staff in general is awesome and very hard-working. Great teachers that use the peer concept and have the kids play, talking minimally. They have weekly 1.5 hr staff meetings where they present problems to each other with which they are struggling and share an Opus moment of a time a kid showed them something. Dalouge is also a fantastic leader and won a Governance award of all the non-profits from a national leadership organization.


Glenn Thomas, an El Sistema global advocate, and his wife Judith generously took me out to dinner and a walk on the beach. Thanks again! He wants to construct an ES global team  to help implement programs. We need more people like him who are on the business side of things and, more importantly, not running their own nucleo! Cool sand sculpture as an aside.
A student practicing during snack break. Broke into a Coldplay duo.

I felt proud after our strings seminar with our string fellows, that I was able to correct hand positions, bow position, and violin position :)
 Peer teaching a new student how to play
Balboa Park. Isn't it beautiful?? Many more of Balboa Park on Facebook ;p

Thursday, October 18, 2012

Residency Part I: MN and San Diego

Tomorrow marks a week of me on the road, granted my MN trip was more than just residency, watching a best friend get married and having some quality family dinners. Watching ACME in action was almost surreal. I found an old notepad from last year and it's incredible to see how much progress we've made! While the kids weren't always well-behaved, overall it was a productive class, and even the "troublemakers" got a turn to be leaders at some point during class. I was amazed to see how fast they were able to sing Camptown Races on solfegge (I certainly underestimated them) with hand signals or rather "secret hand signs." Some of the kids have really good intonation! And I got to exhibit my Lorrie Heagie classroom mgmt tools and..THEY WORKED!!! Right before we left Boston, we met the Friends who support our program and one of them is from Venezuela and is an author who gifted us each a copy of her bilingual book. Pretty cool!

Since Mon, I've been in San Diego/Chula Vista, where it is 90+˚ every day. MN was 28˚ in the evenings with highs in the 40s. Quite a contrast! Before I begin, I want to commend SDYS for doing excellent work and truly making their program part of the community. I've met w a lot of staff including the CEO of SDYS, the dev director, and the associate director who gave me lots of unanticipated knowledge of operations, collected resources, interviewed students and parents about their experience and "Opus moments", had lunches with teachers, and am being spoiled/hosted by the program director having lots of green juices, Mexican food, a home-cooked salmon and asparagus meal last night and Thai food tonight. The least I could do was impromptu sight read accompany for her GS choir. Oh, and you haven't lived til you've had an avocado in CA. AMAZING! Coronado was so humid that my hair was literally soaking wet and the fog so thick I couldn't see anything, but I've seen the famous del Coronado hotel. Balboa Park is so beautiful and there is a plethora of activity there from ballet, museums, the zoo, gardens, an international village, a Spanish art village, and the office of SDYS.

Lots of good questions have come to the table and I am excited to discuss all of them w my fellow fellows. The main one that pertains to San Diego is a continued inquiry of what constitutes an ES program?? SDYS's goal is to make music accessible and affordable to all by bringing music back into the school day and despite this being a ten year vision, they achieved this across the whole school district within 7 months of opening! This is not only amazing because of the brief time in which it was accomplished, but also because CA has one of the fewest music ed programs in schools across the country and the DISTRICT paid to implement this into their schools, not to mention the sustainability effect it has on the Chula Vista community!

But does this (posed merely as a question, not a judgement) constitute as an El Sistema-inspired program? If your definition of El Sistema is bringing music education to all, then certainly! But since the US has yet to define what an El Sistema-inspired program is, the answer is undefined. Certainly this is a national need of bringing music back into the schools in a new manner.

Erik Holmgren says we shouldn't ask that evil question of "What is El Sistema" anyway and we should rather ask if it addresses a community need, which it certainly is. But just for trying to denote of what El Sistema-inspired programs constitute, is a requisite of ES that it has to be after school if they are teaching using a social curriculum? And what does a social curriculum look like? If one is teaching in a way that is effective, uses peer teaching, ensemble-based, and empowers the students, is it not ES? And is frequency a requisite? Because trying to put music back into the school day requires time, Opus can only meet twice a week. But after seeing their concert today after two years, there clearly is still an amazing output!

Clearly Opus has done some amazing work in the Chula Vista community, despite meeting only twice a week. And they're one step ahead of the majority of nucleos in that they meet a third day a week at a middle school and involve those students as well!

 (continued on next blog)

Wednesday, October 17, 2012

Self Awareness 1

Our Program Director asked us to reflect on the following question, I thought I'd share my reflection.


What I have I learned about myself and what new awareness do I have about who I am and how I exist in the context of the intensity of a group experience?

Much of my self-discovery and awareness happened during the retreat at Gibran’s house, and to avoid being redundant, I will refer whomever reads this to that blog entry. 
To expound on my value of relationships, it has carried into my strengths. Many of my colleagues have remarked on my “power” of networking. I know I have always been good at meeting new people, but had never really thought of it as a “skill” since it seems quite basic to me. Yet, these past few weeks have revealed my Montessori upbringing and my willingness and ability to take risks. In Montessori schools, there are no educational limits, you continue onto the next workbook, when you finish the level on which you are working, and I was on a first name basis with all my teachers, despite the 30-50 age difference of years between us.  Having teachers as friends from such an early age imparted me with an intrepid, ambitious drive to approach anyone. My travels and majorly staying with people I had not met yet have only affirmed Albert’s adage of “Strangers are friends you haven’t met yet.”  All people are just that. People. And I’ve been told countless times people like nothing better than to ask them for their advice. Another skill the Montessori environment instilled in me was my inquisitive nature. As a result this coupled with my intrepid willingness to approach anyone is (IMHO) what makes me such a strong networker, not only for myself, but for the Sistema fellows group. 
I am neither an adrenaline nor thrill seeker in the least, but I’m not afraid to do things that involve unknowns, in fact I thrive on that because that unknown is the conduit for the excitement that usually is generated (described in the former paragraph). It is in this dynamic and mobile environment of having lived in 7+ places since graduation two years ago, that I have become so adaptable and malleable. Yet, it has only been in the presence of others, that I realize now to what extent. 

I’ve also realized, only after Monique posed it in her presentation last week, the emotion I feel most often is excitement. I’ve always known I am an extraordinarily enthusiastic person, but never that excitement is the feeling of which I live. It explains why I have been coined a “lifeaholic” (of which I am by NO means ashamed!), it explains why I have been so nomadic, and my strong reluctance to complacency and, at this point in my life, settling down. It also explains my drive and ambition (and how I co-founded a Sistema nucleo with no prior knowledge).
I am currently grappling with learning to match “the level of hunger” others have without dimming the satiation of my own appetite. A goal of mine is certainly not to reduce that energy (My mantra is I am a sunny tree, full of enthusiasm and passion), but rather utilize that energy in a way that is beneficial and not overwhelming to others. It is the reason my voice becomes approachable rather than credible, why my speeches sometimes go at a presto speed, and why I may clutter your inbox. I am excited about something and want to share it with you or I’m fascinated with what you’re talking about and am expressing my interest by bombarding you with questions. I strive to be able to convey this excitement in a palpable, but not overwhelming way.

Monday, October 8, 2012

Important Considerations for the future of the ES Movement

Internal Capacity
A student came up to one of my colleagues at ES Somerville and was having a rough time. Turns out she had to move in with her aunt and only gets to see her mom on Saturdays now. Naturally, this student became my colleague's shadow, following her everywhere that day. Of course, my colleague complied, and that's what "child first, music second" means. But on a longer term basis, do ES programs create a sense of dependency? I am not affirming this, only posing the question. Because they go all the way through high school the student is able to rely on the support and community that is manifested in that environment. If the nucleo teaches well, the idea of self-efficacy and collective efficacy is developed and the teacher can be left out of the equation, only with the difficulty of emotional attachment and teary goodbyes. But what about the idea of internal capacity and eventually letting the community take it over?
So many international development programs/organizations are formed, and are fortunate enough to continue being funded, but is going into another community and helping without involving the community management a sustainable solution? Could it be possible that a program starts and then is passed onto a community member? Or is the ES expertise, or musicianship expertise, or networking "irreplaceable"? I put this word in quotations because as much as we don't want to acknowledge it, everyone is replaceable (depressing I know). But is it irreplaceable in the sense that it is "better" or more successful than not? It is my biggest issue with international development (the field I was going to pursue before stumbling across ES); implementing programs from the outside only "helping" the community, without them being involved in the aid, only the recipients. Is this really helping?
Where is ES on this line of "helping"?

The Evolving Value of an Orchestra
As we've seen in the news, a lot of orchestras are struggling, including one dear to my heart, the MN Orchestra. Until now, orchestras exist to fulfill art for art's sake, for the marketing value. But, what if we put art back where it was originally intended, for the community, and orchestras had a social value? We had a community concert given by the MN Orchestra and despite 1200 flyers being sent out, 15 community members showed up. Why? Because classical music isn't relevant to them. If we could make classical music have a social purpose, then it would be relevant to all. In Tanzania, they have a teaching artist live in the community and the community tells him/her what they need and it is the teaching artist's job to ensure it happens by involving the community. The Maxine Greene idea of striving for what we don't know that we pursue it regardless. Imagine the power of orchestras if this were their purpose and the harmony (both figurative and literal!) that would exist amongst communities.  There's actually a study being done on just this in Liverpool http://ljmu.ac.uk/NewsUpdate/index_124547.htm

Even Honkfest (brass street activist bands) today in Harvard Square used music for a cause and as a result brought the whole Boston community together of all ages and backgrounds despite the gloomy, COLD and rainy weather. Music unites people. Endstop.

Assessment/Evaluation
We had a wonderful session with Eric Booth on the difference between assessment, evaluation, and research. But to say the least, we are FAR behind! We have all the capabilities to do incredible research, and yet we have yet to collaborate at all. Hopefully the Alliance will assist with this, but time will tell as it does in most cases. I hope that we as a class this year can change this lack of collaboration and this resource/rep library will be well utilized. It's exciting to think I'm going to be the equivalent of a field worker this next month gathering data from literally across the country! It will be fascinating to compile all of this data!! But the fact that we will have SOMETHING for assessment is HUGE!

In other news, I'm becoming more lactose-intolerant, which is quite a bummer, but in moderation, I can still handle cheese, and yogurt and ice cream aren't problems..yet. Mt. Monadnock was a BEAUTIFUL climb with all the fall foliage and a very welcome break with no Sistema chatter. I leave for MN on Thurs and a week from tomorrow I will be in San Diego!




My Five Fundamentals

A question that often surfaces is the difference between El Sistema and normal music education programming? Notice I did not put the word versus. ES programs are NOT meant to supplant the music education programs already in schools, but rather enhance and support them. As soon as Minneapolis understood this, they were 100% on board with ACME (www.acme-music.com) who just launched this past Mon! Anyway, the answer is NOT joy nor passion. While ES programs certainly have this as a value, to say these ingredients are absent in non-ES programs is conceited and more often than not false. There are some wonderfully passionate and joyful educators in the public school system. My answer is five-fold.

1) Holistic Child-ES Programs address the child holistically. ES programs are NOT just about developing a musician, but rather about developing a global citizen and individual. To do this, it is essential to know the child's background, foster healthy relationships with the child's family, and be not just a music teacher for this child, but a role model, friend, and advocate.
2) Social Change-I do not want to claim band/choir/orchestra programs do not manifest social change, but I think it is fair to say, this is not in the mission statement or objective of a typical music education program. This is at the forefront of every ES program
3) Frequency-I use this word rather than intensity because how does one measure intensity objectively? But, very few (if any) school music programs meet 4-6 times a week for at least a couple hours each time. To have a conservatory regimen starting at such a young age is an evident distinction.
4) Community support-The nucleo isn't just for the child; it's for the parents and the community. Families are encouraged to participate, not just attend their kids' concerts. Nucleos (at least successful ones) must address a specific community need and be relevant to and supportive of the community. Yes, this implies LISTENING to the community. This is especially fortified when community stakeholders are involved, a rare occurrence of in-school music programs.
5) Student-centered. The learning is focused on the child's best interests and the best way a child can learn is from his/her peers. As a result the Montessori peer-teaching is an important element of the Sistema way (notice I did not say pedagogy)

The tenet that I'm leaving off that is often mentioned is accessibility because so many in-school programs these days are already accessible to all children. But I thought it was important enough to note. 

Sunday, October 7, 2012

A new lens on Music Ed

SO much has happened since I have last posted that I have broken these most recent blogs into titles to make these readings easier to digest though I must apologize if this one particularly gets too academic or lengthy.

I would love to promote my colleague and former fellow Jonathan Govias (www.jonathangovias.com) who is brilliant and healthily critical of the El Sistema movement. In these past few weeks, he has brought so much to the table quite literally, once with homemade pies and once at the infamous Uno's, though as a side tangent they've stopped w the free apps/snack hours so we'll have to find a new spot-ideas are welcome, and figuratively with influence to the below insights.

Think of any orchestra. Can you name any of the members? Probably not, but chances are the conductor's name effortlessly comes to mind. The idea Dr. Abreu envisions of an orchestra being a model society, an ensemble that TOGETHER creates beauty, becomes significantly reduced when the public is only focused on one individual and all decisions are in that person's hands (no pun intended), the star player, the conductor. But this stardom doesn't only apply to professional orchestras. I'd like to use this blog entry to delve into how this stardom dulls the classroom's creativity and independence and why it is such a rare find to attain collective efficacy.

The idea of collective efficacy or rather that the students can guide themselves with a gentle guidance of a facilitator is a huge concept that should be prevalent in nucleos due to the restoration of ample time.  Yet so often more than not, the idea is relegated to the time-efficient star conductor leading the way.

We as teachers like to talk, yet how do children learn? By imitation, repetition, and observation/ACTION! Talking achieves none of these and is also why very few people will choose a lecture style over a hands-on approach. Furthermore, we may justify talking by rationalizing explanations of "teaching" a concept. However, as JG reasoned, his one year old daughter didn't learn how to walk by him telling her to do so. She learned by observation and imitation, no class needed, and after many repetitions succeeding. What would happen if we used the same approach for music? Instead of having the mere one hour a week or not sufficient rehearsal time, which is usually the explanation for succumbing to this debile approach, ES programs now have the kids multiple times a week.

What's the most obvious difference between a conductor conducting an ensemble and students conducting themselves? The time it takes to achieve success, which is obviously more when there is not a conductor (read: dictator or individual star) telling all what to do and some may argue less time efficient. However, the benefits and the long-term effects that are reaped are significantly greater in the latter. This is due to the idea of the zone of proximal development, or the zone between what a student can do independently and what a student can do with a tiny bit of help. Vlotsky, a Russian psychologist believes that the more distal the learning, the deeper it is ingrained into the child. How many of us have not had this experience?! One reason why music is so powerful! When one decides to self-teach him/herself guitar, the rate of success is quite high because it is the student's motivation that is driving this learning. And, for more academic knowledge, the motivation of a student and the influence and social environment of the motivation of that student, are the primary and secondary factors of learning success. This juxtaposed with studying for the SAT that a student only takes because he/she must and how quickly the information seeps out of the student's brain post-examination would be a more proximal example. I know I can attest to studying a wide amalgam of lexicon for the vocab session, yet if some of those words were to show up now, I could do nothing more than recognize them as words I had to study. In contrast, I still remember pieces I memorized in eighth grade on piano despite the fact Rachmaninoff is a) technically difficult and b) eight pages long.

The ideas of repetition (pattern), emotion, movement, relevance, and curiosity are the five ways to activate a brain (thank you @Lorrie Heagy, another former fellow and Teacher of the Year in AK, http://juneaumusicmatters.blogspot.com). No wonder I can still remember the Rachmaninoff literally ten years later. Music engages in all these ways (and more).

On a simpler, more basic note, what is the role of the teacher in general? Is learning only a one way street (teacher imparting knowledge to the child)? Any great teacher (and I fully concur) says he/she learns more from the students than she is imparting on the students. One of my colleagues says she has changed her language in the following way: Instead of saying "give," she says "foster";  "" she says "encourage"; and "teach" she says "facilitate."

So can we/will we change the way we teach so as to truly educate and manifest critical thinking as the beautiful educators of SOKA, Montessori, some El Sistema sites and other alternative educators do, or will we continue with our inefficient, but "time-efficient" dictatorship? 

Tuesday, September 25, 2012

My religion

http://blogs.telegraph.co.uk/culture/jmacmillan/100066610/does-richard-holloway-and-other-leftist-class-warriors-realise-that-el-sistema-has-links-with-opus-dei/

Often enough I get the question, "Are you religious?" or "Are you Christian?" My response now is "I'm not conservative, if that's what you're asking," because usually consciously or subconsciously that is what they are inferring. I am a believer of God, that is what I am certain. And after a discussion tonight, I know why I am so deeply rooted to El Sistema.

The above article appeared in my Inbox shortly after that conversation and while the author seems to denigrate Abreu for this role, I condone it. The reason why El Sistema is my Purpose with a capital "P" is because of the spiritual aspect of it. Perhaps I am blasphemous for saying this, but is the purpose of El Sistema, social change, not that which Jesus called us to do? Jesus, the historic man, came to eradicate the empire system and meet people where they're at with the "last shall be first" mentality..Well? Is that not what we're doing with El Sistema? Giving opportunities to those who in other circumstances are "last"? Is El Sistema not the "good news." a gift that anyone can receive? Dare I take it as far as saying I am in a discipleship program that next year will go harmonize people in the songs of music?

But the difference with El Sistema that makes it more meaningful to me than "religion" is the fact that music is a thread of unity. Anyone can relate regardless of their background. Sure, there are different types of music and pedagogies, theories, etc. etc. but everyone has been exposed to music in some way in their lifetime. I challenge you to disprove this. If you do have someone in my mind, I venture to guess you are thinking of "music" in a box of the Western paradigm with specific qualifiers-the same way many people have codified Christians.

So yes, I strive to live a life full of unconditional love, grace, forgiveness, and joy, accepting everyone for who they are, and learning from them. Perhaps these are "Christian" qualities, but I hate that nomenclature because it excludes so many others and infers only Christians contain these. Rather, I am a global learner, learning from all walks of life, and hopefully leading a life that will bring about social change. What that means the community will have to decide. 

Tuesday, September 11, 2012

2 hrs->semester class, realizations galore

So I finally had the opportunity to meet Erik Holmgren the previous PD in a non-interview context and wowzers. He has SO much to say and information to give away. Within the first five minutes, I wrote down five books I should read and by Fri have to make my own personal mission statement. I learned SO much in that two hours. Everything from not asking the question of what El Sistema is, but rather framing it in terms of what the community needs are to learning etymologies of words (yes I'm a nerd). We need to redefine music as something that evokes social change and the power it has on community as it was originally used, and cease to make music a "thing," Art for the sake of art. This is not to say that  we can't create beauty/Art through this community, but instead of measuring ticket sales, we need to measure children.

This really resonated with me and brought me back to my senior paper. Music used in the community setting as the Mapuche do even if it is simplistic so people can participate rather than the theory, complexity, and satisfaction value music has in the Western world.

As far as the retreat yesterday, wowzers! Lots of realizations, some of which I'll admit I'm not quite ready to disclose to the whole world wide web, but I can share if someone asks me. But here is an excerpt from my journal yesterday:

"We had a session today that made us cry, examine, listen, dig, dig some more, create, laugh, and really get to know one another as real human beings. SOme excellent questions came to the surface and I want to articulate them here. I'll start on the happy, lighter side of things. What brings me joy?

I started with the trite (but true) response of cute, little animals, children laughing and exploring the world. Those are all true statements! Connecting with people, going on adventures, having meaningful conversations. But as I dug deeper and the same question was repeated to me, my ultimate joy was uncovered: the feeling I get when I play music with no preoccupations, doubts or boundaries. There are no limits, not even the grandiose horizon is in sight. Just merely the notes that create a space where any emotion can be unleashed and the true radiance and golden light that fills my whole inner being and is truly indescribable, try as I might.

The second question was what gives my life meaning and through many activities today the same idea reverberated: relationships. Of course of loved ones, but also of flighting ones. People who came in, perhaps lingered, and then walked right out of my life and the appreciation I have in sharing whatever that moment brought to light: a meaningful conversation or discussion, a memorable walk, a significant friendship despite the duration, a philosophical challenge or a new way to think about a jaded topic. The fact that I realized in my E Africa solo trip of music being a common thread that connects us together.

And somehow combining these relationships and this common thread to creation, Mother Earth, nature. From the purple-colored mountains in the Absaroka Beartooth Wilderness to the true aqua waters of Lake Colca and Torres del Paine; from the sunset in San Pedro de Atacama to the vast, savannas of Tanzania, from the silverback gorillas branch thrashing millimeters from my face to the moonlike quality of the Tongariro Crossing and the mere awe of the glowworm caves; from the fine sands of Nahat to the breadth of the aquatic world beneath us in Zanzibar; from the African mamas with a three meter sugar cane atop their heads and their brilliant, colorful dresses to the spicy salsa dancers and dancing on the roof till 5 AM; from the crowded daladalas and micro rides to the kitchen of a true Italian, these are only a snapshot of what I've experienced in my 24 years of age. But they are all of our beautiful world that surrounds each and every day and the palette of emotions.

We also talked about what limited us and I fall back on this societal norms, knowing I'm not normal idea and afraid to do something because of what someone else might think. I have made great progress, but I think I can go further. I need to embrace my eccentricities and LIVE it, not shy away from it and try to covertly abscond it. I am SO the OPPOSITE of apathetic, disinterested and unambitious-I need to let that shine!

I also came back to the idea of not only a purposeful life, but a balanced one. When I was asked the question what keeps me off-purpose, I stated it was okay for me to take a break becaues I am constantly going 1000+ mph and sometimes I need to breathe, albeit not nearly as long as the avg person but 1-2 hrs is a good thing. I"m so "on" sometimes, constantly philosophizing, reflecting and learning (and that's a gift not to let life just pass me by). But i need to remember the downtime is essential in this balanced life as is activity that is not necessarily purposeful."

I would love feedback, comments, and anything else that this made people think of, that they are struggling with or thinking about in their own lives. That's the only reason I posted a personal journal entry word-for-word here.

It's getting colder here! Autumn has arrived, but the days are GORG!

Signing off from my new home in JP where I have this new routine of being up before 7 AM,
Sara

Monday, September 10, 2012

The first classes

Maybe a better title will come to me, but I have officially had my first classes, one with Tony on our speeches and the role of a mediator and one with Albert Oppenheimer (fellow from last year) from the YOURS project in Chicago on community mapping and improv.

Tony was not afraid at all to tell it how it is but incredibly useful feedback. We learned about the difference between credible and approachable voice. I have a very approachable voice and I need to learn on making it more credible. This will help my classroom management too. However, I didn't get too high in the decibel levels and I was more poised than I thought. I need to work on not using my hands as much (blame the Italian in me) and I need to stand more center and address the whole room. I enjoyed telling my story though and was very impressed with almost everyone's public speaking skills. No one was stage fright-I guess that's the pro of being musicians. It will be so rewarding to see how much we all improve. It also made me realize the experiences I am going to undergo with these nine fellows...we are going to experience a PLETHORA of experiences together!! Being critiqued in front of each other is only the beginning.

Community mapping is a very useful skill and I received some great sample emails on how to introduce myself to the community and be approachable. Though the time consumption issue is definitely a dilemma. Hopefully the next board meeting ACME members can go into the community and find out some new orgs for us to know about.

But the improv...that was powerful. We started just by playing one note and talking about the basic elements of music: sound and silence. Then we gradually added more complex concepts like dynamics, repetition, etc. Diogo tried to conduct us, but it was too composed in the literal sense. So I suggested we do what I did at Stillwater: close our eyes. And when we did that it was beautiful and truly a piece of music improvised and from the heart. Our barriers were let down and people weren't afraid to use their voices, both of their own and of their instrument. That performing experience is the first of many to come and it is so wonderful to again encounter the feeling of ensemble. All I wanted to do after that was play with everyone. It's instances like these that make me enjoy performing, not the solo stuff. From Monique's fluttering flute, to Andrea's vibrato cello, to Carlos' muted trumpet (never mind with Rachel's sweater), to Diogo's sus9 chords, it was a really special mixture.

Then it was time for Uno's (one I'm sure of many) where we celebrated Elaine's bd (never mind the cake that melted everywhere but was delicious if I do say so myself (my first vegan cake!)) and stayed there for 4 hours! I hope this camaraderie doesn't get jaded because right now everyone is so inclusive and on top of their game collectively. We even met on the holy day of Sun. to discuss our interview questions.

Highlight of the weekend: Seeing Train and Gavin DeGraw FREE and some great people watching while doing so.
Lowlight: Being locked out of the house for four hours because the door got locked so the cat would stay inside and I was eating breakfast outside after an exhausting zumba class..meaning I got stuck in my sweaty, aerobic clothes all afternoon. But the upstairs roommate is nice and gave me water and let me hang out with her.

Well I'm on this new schedule where I go to bed "early" (and wake up early no matter what time I go to bed) so I best be off.

Here's to another week!! My next posting I should know my residency plans (they're in the making right now but San Diego, Virginia Beach, and Larkspur (CA) look to be so far..)

Thursday, August 30, 2012

Whew

Wow these days are a whirlwind! Even I (yes it's possible) can be exhausted. I actually opted out of a yoga class to come back to the place I'm staying and have some chill/alone time. Being surrounded by people constantly is great and I am so looking forward to a wonderful year, but it's really nice to do my own thing once in awhile. It's so cool to be surrounded by people from literally all over the world and even though four of the fellows are orig from CA, they all have completely diverse backgrounds. Hearing where everyone had lived the first day, I think we were only missing Antarctica. All the faculty are incredibly supportive and the words "Abreu fellow" (the old name of Sistema fellow) is gold.

I wish there were more to report, but aside from the stress of finding a home (which, fingers crossed, I think I've FINALLY attained 2.5 months later) and lots and lots of introductions/orientation activities including the typical speeches, slideshows, fairs, tours, and the unconventional Sam Adams brewery tour, sunset cruise, and pub crawl, I can only give my first impressions. My favorite is when I introduce myself to a grad student and have to explain what a Sistema Fellow is (so far my working definition is learning how to set up music programs in underprivileged neighborhoods and usually giving them the link to watch Dr. Abreu).

Everyone is awesome. I won't lie, it will be difficult with 8 women and 2 guys. Per normal, I gravitate towards the guys though after a friend told me I give off masculine energy I suppose that makes sense. I'm continuing to bike everywhere and make new friends. I'm staying with a gracious friend of one of the fellows from Brazil who is not only moving out on Fri, but also insisted we cook a meal last night-he suggested pasta-which meant homemade sauce, and I made a salad and bought some fresh watermelon. Delish!

As far as my resolution is going, I would say it's more or less at that stagnant phase though when I was in MN I did what I wanted, knowing full well there could/(was warned there would) be repercussions. But after some conversations they got hammered out and everyone understood in the end. The fact is I didn't let someone tell me what I should/shouldn't do and BIG NEWS: I DIDN"T FEEL GUILT OR APOLOGIZE for what I did.. It's important to live a balanced life-everyone should work AND play hard. This second part of the phrase so often dissipates and I strive to not suffer that same fate.

The Boundary Waters (both times) were a wonderful escape. When I went to PA for my gpa's 80th bd I had a mild nervous freakout sesh when I didn't have housing, but after that decided it would turn out (se van a salir mentality), there was nothing I could do to change it, and worrying about it would do nothing productive. So both times I went into the bliss of the BWCA with calmness, and only let myself be immersed in the callings of the loon, the endurance of a 460 rod (1+ mile) portage, the Perseids meteor shower, the strokes of the canoe paddle,the innovation to try things like Tang-covered smores, and building relationships with the people I went with. I also feel I've moved on from the "camp counselor" time in life completely. We had a great group and I was extremely thankful for that, but trying to relate to people 6 years younger than you while possible just seems pointless as I will never see them again. It was great to see new friendships forming though and watch the impact of teamwork and memories be cherished.

The one concept I continued to return to in my journal and the reason I think any team (a marriage, an exec team, a family, whomever) should do an excursion like this is that it is one of few places where what one individual does or doesn't do affects everyone. If someone reads a map wrong, you can get pissed and tell them how stupid they are. But that does nothing. In our daily lives (I hate using the phrase "the real world"), that "stupid" person would be fired or have to suffer the consequences for only themselves, whereas in this environment where everyone is eating, doing, and possessing the same things, it is quite powerful. Watching my dear brother go from sleeping in and doing nothing to pitch in in the morning to waking up when everyone else did and truly helping was really meaningful to see. Of course there are people who are more natural leaders than others, but everyone truly pitched in and overcame blisters, bug bites, soreness, and whatever else, to be a rock solid team and stronger family/freshman class.

I'm sure there will be much more to tell as our calendar fills up, but right now school is pretty what you would expect. It will be really interesting and impactful to have a program director who is a seven year employee of a community music program (pre-EL SIstema USA). I'm stoked! No expectations-here we go!!!

Tuesday, July 31, 2012

Stagnancy/Being Ordinary

Yes I know I should be sleeping. Especially since I"m going to attempt to get up for a 730 exercise class..but isn't that always when the mind wants to ponder. So I am doing a data entry temp job for the next three days and after 6 hours, I am very thankful I've saved enough that I haven't had to worry about doing this all summer because that was my limit. It was a beautiful, summer day, not too hot, and here I was shivering in a far too a/ced unit (have I mentioned I hate a/c!) wasting away my life typing in numbers for a study. Granted, the study is pretty interesting, but I'm learning fast, if I'm going to be involved in research it will only be the collaborating/doing part, not the evaluation/analysis part. Having been doing the evaluation part for my "internship" plus this data entry has been a bit too much, but only two more days. Real life is back in full swing and deciding to leave my new chapter of life for three weeks I think was a bit ambitious. Granted, it WILL be great to be in person at A.C.M.E. meetings, see friends, and go to my favorite place in the world the BWCA, but after having yet another awesome weekend with new friends and SO many happenings going on, not to mention new possibilities with this internship of becoming solfegge literate, this data entry full-time position, and trying to figure out housing (which may end up being a coop in the area I want to live in after all!) deciding to leave I can only hope will be fruitful and not stressful.

As far as my resolution is going, I feel like the above paragraph has detracted from it and I'm certainly at a point of stagnancy/shrinking back into my old grind. Any recommendations are warmly welcomed.     I need a new inspiration or person to challenge me or something. It's too easy to slip back into my comfort zone when I am not forced out. Which brings me to the feeling of ordinary. Words I think of to connote ordinary: boring, uninteresting, plain. Dictionary.com says: with no special features..normal. Now to me, these two definitions are very different. We all desire to be normal (at least societal norms do), but yet we all strive to be special. I feel like these two definitions contradict, no? But I digress..

Today was as ordinary a day as I ever want and even then I went to an Iftar feast (breaking of the Ramadan fast) which obviously was not ordinary in the slightest, but made the day (and my mood) more difficult, not completely fasting, but only eating a small amount of veggies at lunch. After watching American Beauty (you should too!), there's a girl in the movie that never wants to be ordinary and honestly, I agree. Granted, I don't think anyone wants to be ordinary, but so many people succumb to it. They don't have the ambition, the will, the "means" or rather the drive, to change or they're conditioned to think there is no other choice. But nevertheless I don't want part in the "real world," the 9-5, the job, the house, the bills. Some say I just haven't found that, but I have been out of school for two years. Sure, I"m not making big dough, but I am surviving. I know my twenties won't be my life, but I don't know if they'll change as much as they do for the "normal" (or ordinary) person because as I stated above I'm not her...and I still have 5 years!

On a different note entirely, Catholics please explain the decision of saving a baby over a mother!!!!!!!! But there are Catholic churches in town that embrace interfaith! There's a new wind coming on (a title of a song I wrote awhile back)

 Ok bedtime

Thursday, July 19, 2012

Traveling...Denotation vs Connotation. Hobby or vocation?

So after meeting another CS "wanderer," last night, I've decided to expound on the word "traveling." According to good ol' Webster, 1) "to go on as if on a trip or tour," 2)  "to move from one place to another," 3) "to journey through or over." When I met this guy last night, he didn't say the typical, "I'm traveling." He rather said, "I'm wandering." When one says travel, it probably does signify a) there is a specific length of time (the tour definition), but b) that you're merely traversing through an area. Traveling isn't the right word to describe when you are going to an area to truly know it (conocer in Spanish) rather than to say you've been there. This also has to do with traveling for places v traveling for people. I myself certainly do both. Perhaps this is why I hate touristy places so much. Because there's no chance in getting to know the people or the area. The locals see you only as a simple customer to buy their product, rather that be a tour, hotel, or food. As I'm sure many of you already know, this is why CS is so amazing. You are not only staying with locals, but they usually show you things you would only know from being with a local.

When the CS last night said he went to Chile for a month and spent every day but one in Santiago, many people were offended and couldn't believe he hadn't gone to Patagonia in the south (I'll admit even I said you should have gone cuz it truly is beautiful). But that wasn't his purpose in going. The day he took to go to Valpo was a waste because he only went to see it. He didn't have time to get to know it. This is why I try to go to a place and truly get to know it rather than going to 10 cities in one week.

So back to the question at hand. Wanderer vs traveler. To me wandering implies you have no set route (True), no purpose (argued the purpose is sought along the away), and no limits as to what you may do. It isn't vacation, but I propose rather a catalyst to find one's vocation by learning about others and being pushed out of one's comfort zone with excellent discussion and a myriad of experiences. When I was in Europe, people often asked how long I had been on vacation. But despite the fact I wasn't working, it wasn't vacation. To me, vacation is when you go to one spot and do nothing. Traveling (IMHO at least) is almost an exact contrast. You're invigorating all five senses plus your brain, heart, and spirit. There aren't a whole lot of things that do this all at once and perhaps that's why I love it so much. I'm a sensual person in the truest and most literal sense of the word.
I also expressed last night how difficult it was for me to answer the unanswerable question, "How was XX (Tanzania, Chile, and heck even Boston)?" He brought up some good coping mechanisms that I'd like to share in case anyone else is struggling. First, don't bring up the fact that you've been there unless it comes up in conversation (to me this just invites boring, mundane conversation, but I'll try it). B) Point out, the amazing things they have that you don't have (living in one place, being married, etc) C) Don't let it get put on a pedestal.

But what I realized through this and him saying the sentence "When I was living in Germany and WOOFing in Switzerland," is that traveling like many things is a hobby that has particular lingo and a sense of understanding to which only fellow travelers can relate. This is not meant to sound exclusive, but if I name drop places, or someone says the above sentence, many would respond with the perplexed outburst of "YOU"VE LIVED IN SWITZERLAND AND FARMED FOR FREE???" or something along those lines. Where as my response last night was a mere nod.  This is not meant to sound superior, purely observation. We can understand each other and this is why I love CS so much. I can say in Tanzania... without getting this type of undesired attention. It's analogous to computer programmers. If they start talking about HTML code I am completely lost. If they talk about a program on a Mac I will more than likely understand, but I don't understand the intricacies nor appreciation on the same level of them and on some level, it blows my mind a bit how they can manipulate things so easily just by recoding (maybe not the best analogy, but you get my drift). Ditto sports. When traveling isn't a passion/hobby of someone, they just look at these places on a map that are far away from them, as wow I can't believe you've been to XXX, but they themselves don't necessarily have a desire to go there (Please correct me if you feel differently).

You can say they might have desire, but no money, but as Aleph by Paolo Coelho states, you don't need a lot of money to travel and most of my experiences have been on the tightest budget (most less than daily living expenses). It's a matter of me making it happen and living life how I want to live it. As Switchfoot states, "This is your life. Are you who you want to be?" When people live vicariously through me going to these places, I struggle because they too could, if they wanted to and were willing to deal with (for lack of a better word) the repercussions that come along with this nomadic lifestyle.


As Henry David Thoreau states, why don't we measure life in terms of LIFE, an intangible, infinite, resource rather than wealth, a finite, materialistic resource? What is the point of me buying a house that I will be indebted to for twenty years when I can use that money to see so many places and better myself and hopefully others by doing so.Who's saying I will ever want to stay in that place long enough? Marriage to me will be a true reason to travel. I'll have a guaranteed travel companion.Forever. I'm starting to wonder if settling down will ever be a concept with which I can relate, and honestly the older I get, the more I'm okay with this and breaking out of the traditional lifestyle. I think someone (and obviously plenty of people are) can be perfectly happy working a 9 to 5 and having a family they love. I'm not saying that's any less or more than the wandering lifestyle. It's just a matter of living life, whatever that means to you. Today's challenge for you is to examine what you really want to do and make steps to DO IT! No more complaining about the shitty economy (which quite honestly is more reason to go do something since nothing is going to come from sitting here writing countless cover letters to jobs you don't usually want anyway). 
Okay off to work for me now.